12th May2009

watchoo got NEW MOVIE!?

by jerad.formby


In this Alternate Reality Take on the New Film . . .
Backgrounds are White and “Wrath” is spelled “Wraith.”

–Notes Old Spock





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Star Trek: The Motion Picture
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Star Trek continuity whores need to give it a rest
The new Doctor Who . . . or lack thereof!
Why the new Star Trek movie is gonna be cool
Joss Whedon’s Dollhouse
How the Borg went from badass to blowing chunks
Some Star Trek characters get no love
Ronald D. Moore’s Battlestar Galactica
Why Watchmen’s So Bad
Star Trek Optimism
Ugly Romulans and Vulcans

  • April Hebert

    That’s what I’m talking about… We need to stop being so protective and proprietary and give it up. It doesn’t mean defeat, unless you secretly liked being part of a stereotyped, denigrated, and constantly insulted group because it made you feel “special.” It means that we have to learn to share, which is really hard for two-year-olds but not for adults. Some of us will have to grow up now…

  • http://www.daytonward.com Dayton Ward

    Dude, you so crack me up. 😀

  • Raul4510

    Star Trek 2009 is so good… I hope I win that TOS Season 1 Blu-Ray set… yum…yum…yum… yum….

    bluuuuuuuuurp… beam me up!!!

  • zancho

    i think my only complaint is that we’ve only got 8 minutes of extra footage to look forward to when the dvd comes out!

  • Ryan

    Very well written and makes the point Jerad. I think they pulled it off very well and made a Trek for the 21st century. Yet they still made it so we can make it connect to the old Trek universe.

  • http://www.invocus.net Jamie

    Thank you for this hilarious and yet totally accurate article! Brilliant.

  • http://twitter.com/Smittmaestro Smittmaestro

    I love your use of lens flares!


  • Steve

    Best reviewed movie of the summer (so far). Pre-screening ratings off the chart (or at least in the mid-90%). No safety net. Amazing special effects. And Kirk, et al, adventuring in their prime. Trekkies need a reality check. I say this as an old-school Trekkie. Excellent again, sir.

  • http://adamnbowen.com/ Adam

    Why not just actually put the text in html, instead of taking a picture of typed text and then making it blurry?

    ps… it’s “Wrath of Khan,” not “Wraith of Khan.”

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  • http://dharmadesigns.etsy.com Wendy Baylis

    After watching the 3 new Star Wars movies I was terrified the same would happen to Star Trek – especially with the alternate reality plot. I went into this movie wanting to hate it and pick it apart – but ended up LOVING it! Wow – what a ride! Can’t wait to see what they do next!

  • RedMan

    I hated the new movie because it is a cheat. Would you re-make Psycho and change Norman Bates into a Dexter type serial killer? Should Harry Potter be re-written to say that Voldemort is Harry’s Father or that Voldermort is the way he is because he was molested by Dumbledore?

    If that’s the case then someone should re-write The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, and The Adventures of Huckelberry Finn to update them and bring them a fresh plot.

  • http://trekcast.com jerad.formby


    I wish you could elaborate more on how the new movie’s a “cheat.” The questions you’re asking don’t work for me in the context I think you mean. To change Norman Bates into Dexter would be to not be Psycho. To put Kirk in the Captain’s chair early doesn’t change him from being a Starship Captain, hence it’s still Star Trek.

    To make Voldemort Harry Potter’s father would be to change Harry Potter into a different person entirely –to destroy Vulcan only changes Spock’s path in life, but not who he is.

    Likewise to blame Voldemort’s evil on molestation from Dumbledorf isn’t nearly the same as crediting the Narada’s futuristic appearance to any Starfleet advances while Kirk is growing up.

    As far as Tom Sawyer goes… The League of Extraordinary Gentleman was an awful movie… so Fresh isn’t always better. Glad that’s not true for Star Trek.